The lyrics of "How He Loves" have become a cornerstone of contemporary Christian music, known for their raw, visceral imagery and emotional depth. Originally written by John Mark McMillan in 2005, the song transitioned from a personal outpouring of grief into a global anthem sung by millions. While many recognize the soaring chorus, the verses contain complex metaphors—including the famous "hurricane" and the controversial "sloppy wet kiss"—that require a deeper understanding of their origin to fully appreciate.

Full Lyrics of How He Loves

Below are the standard lyrics as originally penned by John Mark McMillan, including the bridge and verses that characterize the most complete versions of the song.

(Verse 1) He is jealous for me Love's like a hurricane, I am a tree Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory And I realize just how beautiful You are And how great Your affections are for me

(Pre-Chorus) Oh, how He loves us so Oh, how He loves us How He loves us so

(Chorus) Yeah, He loves us Oh, how He loves us Oh, how He loves us Oh, how He loves

(Verse 2) We are His portion and He is our prize Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes If grace is an ocean, we're all sinking So heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss And my heart turns violently inside of my chest I don't have time to maintain these regrets When I think about the way that...

(Bridge/Outro - Optional in some versions) I thought about You the day Stephen died And You met me between my breaking I know that I still love You, God, despite the agony They want to tell me You're cruel But if Stephen could sing, he'd say it's not true Cause He loves us...

The Tragic Origin of the Song

The emotional weight of "How He Loves" is not a product of calculated songwriting; it was born from a moment of profound personal tragedy. In 2005, John Mark McMillan was grappling with the death of one of his closest friends, Stephen Coffey.

Stephen was a youth pastor who had a deep desire to see a spiritual awakening in his community. During a church staff meeting shortly before his death, he reportedly prayed a prayer that would become prophetic: "I'd give my life today if it would shake the youth of the nation." That very night, Stephen was killed in a car accident.

For McMillan, the loss was staggering. He wrote "How He Loves" in the days following the accident as a "conversation with God." The song was a way to process anger, shock, and the confusing reality of a God who is both loving and sovereign in the face of death. This background explains why the imagery in the song is so intense; it wasn't written for a Sunday morning service—it was written for a funeral and for the quiet, dark moments of mourning.

Interpreting the Metaphors of Verse 1

The first verse introduces some of the most striking imagery in modern worship. To understand the lyrics, one must look at both the linguistic choices and the theological roots.

The Hurricane and the Bending Tree

"Love's like a hurricane, I am a tree / Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy."

In our experience listening to standard worship songs, "love" is often described as a gentle breeze or a warm light. McMillan chooses a different path. A hurricane is destructive, overwhelming, and impossible to control. By comparing God's love to a hurricane, the lyrics suggest that divine love is not always comfortable. It is a force that breaks us down and forces us to bend.

The "weight of His wind and mercy" implies that mercy itself can be heavy. In the context of Stephen’s death, McMillan was experiencing a love that felt violent and chaotic, yet was fundamentally rooted in God’s character. The "bending" represents the human response to tragedy: we either bend or we break.

The Jealousy of God

"He is jealous for me."

This line often catches new listeners off guard, as "jealousy" is typically viewed as a negative human emotion. However, the song draws on the biblical concept of zealous love. As seen in scriptures like Exodus 34:14, God's jealousy is not an insecure envy, but a fierce, protective commitment to His people. It is a "jealousy" that refuses to let the beloved be destroyed by lesser things. In the midst of grief, the lyric asserts that God has not abandoned the sufferer; rather, He is fiercely pursuing them.

Afflictions Eclipsed by Glory

"I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory."

This is perhaps the most difficult line to sing authentically during a time of suffering. It suggests a moment of transcendence where the pain ("afflictions") is not necessarily gone, but is overshadowed by the sheer "beauty" and "glory" of the Divine. In our analysis of McMillan’s original performance, there is a sense of desperation in this line—a soul trying to look past the immediate trauma to see something eternal.

The Controversy of the "Sloppy Wet Kiss"

No discussion of the "How He Loves Us" lyrics is complete without addressing the line: "So heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss." This single phrase caused a significant rift in the worship music industry and led to one of the most famous lyrical edits in history.

The Original Intent

McMillan used the phrase "sloppy wet kiss" to describe something unrefined, passionate, and raw. He wanted to move away from the "clean" and "mechanical" language often found in religious circles. To him, the Incarnation—the moment heaven met earth—was messy and visceral. Like a child giving a parent a "sloppy wet kiss," it is an expression of love that doesn't care about decorum or "looking right."

The "Unforeseen Kiss" Edit

When the David Crowder Band decided to cover the song for their album Church Music, they encountered resistance from Christian radio and certain denominations. Many found the original imagery too carnal or distracting for a corporate worship setting.

In response, David Crowder changed the line to "unforeseen kiss."

  • The Pro-Edit View: Proponents of the change argue that "unforeseen" maintains the element of surprise and grace without the potentially distracting or uncomfortable connotations of the original phrase. It allows the congregation to focus on the theology rather than the literal imagery.
  • The Originalist View: Many of McMillan’s followers felt the change diluted the song’s power. They argued that by "cleaning up" the song, the raw honesty born from Stephen Coffey's death was being sanitized for the sake of palatability.

In our practical testing of these versions, the "unforeseen kiss" version definitely feels more "at home" in a traditional church service, whereas the "sloppy wet kiss" version retains a grit that is better suited for personal reflection or more progressive, youth-oriented environments.

Deep Dive into Verse 2: Ocean and Prize

The second verse shifts the focus toward the concepts of redemption and the vastness of grace.

Portion and Prize

"We are His portion and He is our prize."

This line establishes a reciprocal relationship. "Portion" refers to the Old Testament concept of an inheritance. To say we are God's portion means that He values humanity as His own treasure. Conversely, He is our "prize"—the ultimate goal and reward of our faith.

Sinking in the Ocean of Grace

"If grace is an ocean, we're all sinking."

This metaphor perfectly captures the scale of the song. Throughout our review of worship themes, "water" is a recurring motif for purification, but here, it is about immersion. To "sink" in grace implies that it is not something we just dip our toes into; it is an all-encompassing environment. In the context of McMillan’s grief, "sinking" might have felt like drowning, but the lyrics reframe that sensation as being overwhelmed by a grace that is bigger than the tragedy.

Musical Structure and Its Impact on the Lyrics

The way "How He Loves" is composed plays a vital role in how the lyrics are perceived.

The 6/8 Time Signature

The song is written in a 6/8 time signature, which gives it a swaying, waltz-like feel. At a BPM (beats per minute) of approximately 150 (in the Shane & Shane and Crowder versions), the song has a driving momentum. This "pulse" mimics a heartbeat or the rhythmic crashing of waves, reinforcing the "ocean" and "hurricane" metaphors found in the text.

Key and Chords

The song is traditionally played in the Key of C Major, which is often associated with purity and simplicity.

  • Standard Progression: C - Am7 - Gsus - Fmaj7.
  • The "Am7" Influence: The use of the A-minor 7th chord provides a slight melancholic tension that resolves into the "Gsus," perfectly mirroring the lyrical journey from "affliction" to "glory."

The Bridge's Absence in Covers

In the original John Mark McMillan version, there is a spoken/sung bridge where he mentions "the day Stephen died." Most cover versions (Crowder, Shane & Shane, Jesus Culture) omit this section. While this makes the song more "universal" for listeners who didn't know Stephen, it removes the specific "Experience" factor that gave the song its initial spark. Listening to the original version with the Stephen mention provides a far more visceral experience than the radio edits.

Comparing Key Cover Versions

Different artists have interpreted these lyrics through their own stylistic lenses, affecting the listener's emotional journey.

1. David Crowder Band (The Radio Standard)

The David Crowder Band version is responsible for the song's massive popularity. Crowder’s gravelly voice and the "unforeseen kiss" edit made the song accessible to the masses. This version feels like a communal celebration, emphasizing the "Oh, how He loves us" anthem.

2. Jesus Culture feat. Kim Walker-Smith (The Charismatic Anthem)

Kim Walker-Smith’s live version is legendary for its length (often exceeding 8 minutes) and intensity. In our assessment, this version focuses less on the technical lyrics and more on the "experience" of the love described. Her delivery of "He loves us" becomes an evocative, repetitive cry that moves many into a state of deep meditation. She famously retains the "sloppy wet kiss" lyric, staying true to the original's raw nature.

3. Shane & Shane (The Harmonic Approach)

Shane & Shane bring their signature acoustic harmonies to the song. Their version highlights the "Portion and Prize" section with intricate vocal layering. It is a more polished, "vertical" worship experience that focuses on the beauty of the melody.

Understanding the "Jealousy" Theology

Because the line "He is jealous for me" is so central, it's worth exploring the theological background to help readers understand why it is a comforting, rather than a frightening, lyric.

In biblical Hebrew, the word often translated as "jealous" (qanna) is frequently used to describe God’s relationship with His people. Unlike human jealousy, which is often rooted in insecurity or a desire to control for selfish reasons, divine jealousy is viewed as a "rightful" claim.

Imagine a husband who is "jealous" for his wife's safety and affection; he doesn't want her to be harmed or led astray by those who would use her. That is the "hurricane" energy McMillan is tapping into. In the aftermath of his friend's death, McMillan needed to believe in a God who was "jealous" enough for him to not let him be consumed by his own despair.

FAQ: Frequently Asked Questions about "How He Loves Us"

Who originally wrote "How He Loves"?

The song was written by John Mark McMillan in 2005. It first appeared on his album The Song Inside the Sounds of Breaking Down.

Why was the "sloppy wet kiss" lyric changed?

It was changed primarily for Christian radio and church services. Many worship leaders felt the imagery was too graphic or distracting for a corporate setting. The most common replacement is "unforeseen kiss."

Who is Stephen in the song "How He Loves"?

Stephen refers to Stephen Coffey, a youth pastor and best friend of John Mark McMillan. His tragic death in a car accident was the primary inspiration for the song.

What does "He is jealous for me" mean?

In the context of the song, it refers to God's intense, protective, and exclusive love for His people, similar to the biblical description of God in the book of Exodus.

Is "How He Loves" a hymn or a contemporary song?

It is a contemporary worship song. While it has the longevity of a hymn, its structure and origins are firmly rooted in the modern "indie-worship" movement of the early 2000s.

Summary of the Song's Impact

The "How He Loves Us" lyrics remain some of the most analyzed and debated words in modern Christian music. From the tragic death of Stephen Coffey to the global controversy over a "sloppy wet kiss," the song serves as a reminder that the most powerful art often comes from the most painful places.

Whether you prefer the raw, original version by John Mark McMillan or the polished anthems produced by the David Crowder Band and Jesus Culture, the core message remains the same: divine love is a powerful, overwhelming force—a hurricane that bends us, an ocean that sinks us, and a passion that never lets us go. By understanding the "why" behind these words, listeners can find a deeper resonance in every "Oh, how He loves."